Skip to main content

"Fallen from Grace?"

"The times you're healing, and when your heart breaks. The times that you feel like you're falling from grace." --"Times", Tenth Avenue North 
 "Today I feel like I'm just one mistake away, from You leaving me this way." --"East to West", Casting Crowns 
"Look at all the pretty things, that steal my heart away, I can feel I'm fading. Lord I love so many things, that keep me from Your face." --"All the Pretty Things,Tenth Avenue North 
As you can see, falling from grace, or  feeling as if we've lost the Lord is something that all Christians face. Looking at these song lyrics totally inspires me- it's like being welcomed into a family that totally understands what you're going through. It was only by the grace of God that I got out of what happened to me today.
I deliberately disobeyed. I didn't even realize so until I took a look at the clock and realized that I almost missed quiet time. Fast forward, my heart's heavy and I know I need to confess. I do, and literally cast down every thought against my heavenly Prince and every demon in hell and STILL fall into that same stupid hole of condemnation. Joyce Meyer describes condemnation as "trying to make up for the sin God has already forgiven. Our version of paying for sin."

Guilt. It was guilt. That emotion that literally tears down everything that is within me and makes me grieve from the inner being of my soul. Just as David says here, "I was too troubled to speak. I thought about the former fays, the years of long ago; I remembered my songs in the night." I sung along hollowly to the lyrics of a worship song, meanwhile crying out to Him from the depths of my soul. 
After being so close, after tasting just a little of what it's like to be so close to His heart, I could never go back. The very thought of trying to be in charge of my life was breathtaking- enough to have fresh tears co-rouse down my cheeks. 

And then. Seemingly out of nowhere, lyrics that I'd sung months ago about God's love began pouring in my head, slowly at first, and then began collecting as I played them. "Times" was the first. "Fallen from Grace" is the title of this post. "Fallen from grace" was how I could put into words how I was feeling. One day, I was sitting at God's right hand, conversing with Him in my everyday life, living the way I was supposed to and happy. Next day, I feel as if that is all gone- something I will never get back. As David Crowder's version of, "He Loves Us" played on, I looked to see what my Savior had to say about His love. In Psalm 77, David laments become mine. This isn't the first time David and I share the same pit. Such great friends we would have made if he lived in the twenty first century! 

"I cried out to God for help; I cried out to God to hear me. When I was in distress, I sought the Lord; at night I stretched out untiring hands and my soul refused to be comforted. I remembered you, O God, and I groaned; I mused, and my spirit grew faint. I was too troubled to speak. I thought about the former days, the years of long ago; I remembered my songs in the night. My heart mused and my spirit inquired: Will the Lord reject forever? Will he never show his favor again? Has his unfailing love vanished forever? (Have I fallen from grace?)Then I thought, "To this I will appeal: the years of the right hand of the Most High." I will remember the deeds of the Lord; yes, I will remember your miracles of long ago. I will meditate on all your works and consider all your mighty deeds. Your ways, O God, are holy. What god is so great as out God? You are the God who performs miracles; you display your power among the peoples. With your mighty arm you redeemed your people; the descendants of Jacob and Joseph." Medley of Psalm 77 (NIV)
As if on cue, a past message I'd listened to during breakfast replayed in my mind: You choose to believe and your feelings will come after.  Then I poured out and asked God to show me how much He really loves me. Loves you. Loves us all!

God's currently dealing with me now about trusting Him, and knowing He's there even when I can't feel. If this is also something you struggle with, I suggest you tape some verses about Jesus's love for you on your bathroom mirror, confess promises Jesus made concerning you and Him, and even the simplest- saying 'God loves me!' every time you see yourself in the mirror. It might take months, but remember, that seed is still growing!  


istockphoto.com
 "I'm there in your sorrow, under the weigh of your shame. I'm there in your heartache. I'm there in the storm. My love will keep you, by my pow'r alone. I don't care where you fall, or where you have been. I'll never forsake you, my love never ends. It never ends." --"Times", Tenth Avenue North
"I can't live by what I feel. About the truth Your word reveals. I'm not holding onto You, You're holding onto me.  You're holding onto me. In the arms of your mercy I find rest 'cause you know just how far the east is from the west from one scarred hand to the other." --"East to West", Casting Crowns
"We are, we are, we're caught in the in between. But we're fighting for what we already have received." --"All the Pretty Things, Tenth Avenue North 
 He loves you,



Comments

Popular posts from this blog

The Importance of Having a Vision Board

Life gets hard.

That's no secret, and sometimes even a message by Joel Osteen won't get you up out of your dump. I don't know about you, but I find when the 'storms' have stopped for awhile, God's giving me time to restock my spirit before the storm starts again. Just like it says in Psalm 91- "You're my refuge. I trust in you and I'm safe!" For me to really feel strong and secure in my faith in Jesus (that He will deliver my from the traps of the enemy), I have to pull out ALL the stops. This time, I'm highlighting the imperative importance of having a vision board right in front of you.







google.images.com Above are examples of vision boards. The reason I don't say 'dream' is because Jesus is your Dream, not whatever earthly things placed on the board. I say 'vision', because these inspire you to keep going, while also planting a seed of belief inside that the images you see WILL come to pass.
Benefits:
Let's talk benef…

Beastia | Zoe Cruz

What if Beauty became the beast?
Zoe Cruz's newest release, Beastia, comes at an opportune time with Emma Watson's modern adaptation of Beauty and the Beast capturing the hearts of Disney fans all around the world. In a refreshing contrast, Cruz provides a grittier, more realistic version of how the beast could live in the hearts of those closest to us. In fact, with this new release, Mean Girls meets Beauty and the Beast as Chicago scream queen Rebekah Austin rules her school with an iron fist. Although her facade of perfectly manicured hair, nails and outfit might say otherwise, beneath it Rebekah feels ugly, repulsive and even...beastly. 
This is so refreshing from the typical retelling of the story, because Cruz flips the script and challenges the notion that conventionally beautiful women must fall in love with not-so-cute guys (like maybe, quite literally, a beast), when the opposite can occur. Join writer Zoe Cruz in redefining important lessons about beauty, self-worth, …

{Christian Book Review}: Ten Days Without

10 Days Without is a book written to inspire Christians to stop being passive.

In the way they seek God.

In the way they worship Him.

In the way they serve others.

I've noticed and prayed against this habit myself- the tendency we have to move beyond contentment and go into what Day calls 'slackitism'. It's feeling the conviction of the Holy Spirit tell you to do something, and then completing it half way. Or not doing it at all. Or relying on someone else to do what God Himself has called YOU to do.
I love the idea centered around this book. It's calling us to GET UP out of the church and go out and see what God is doing in this broken world. As each section beckons us to give up a comfort to peek into the lives of others while praying and fasting, God gives us a glimpse of what it's like to live in the eyes of the person who doesn't have shoes, or legs.

In this eye-opening book, Day challenged me to fight the tide of 'good intentions' and move into…